I DISCOVERED A BREAST LUMP | PART 1

'I discovered a breast lump'

I never thought I'd find myself writing a post like this at my young age, but it's my life, it's reality and I hope if this post manages to encourage one person to check their breasts then it will be worth while. 

The context: It was 3 years ago that I first discovered a change - I felt a small lump in my breast, and I was so confused I didn't know how or why it had formed so I did some research on the NHS website and examined my breasts and booked a doctors appointment.The doctors appointment: I was told the lump was just a cyst and I could either have it drained or just leave it, and it was recommended at my age unless it was overly uncomfortable to leave it be, so I did. I left my appointment and told myself everything's OK just keep an eye on it. 

So... you've been to the doctors, discovered a lump at 18 and been told it's all OK... Fine right? I thought so too. Like I mentioned, I kept an eye on it and was very conscious about doing more research and checking myself regularly (if you don't already - please start to and look after yourself, your health is more important than anything else in this world) and there was a few times in the last few years where I'd felt it feeling bigger and smaller but nothing to be too alarming. I don't often visit the doctors (touch wood I'm quite healthy!) but each time I do go I always give an update on the lump and ask for it to be checked for changes.

6 weeks ago, everything changed. I did my usual examination once a week in the bathroom and tears started to drop from my eyes. The lump had grew rapidly. The lump was hard. The lump wouldn't move. I didn't know what to do. I was SO scared, I checked a second time, a third, and a fourth time and I just didn't want to believe what I felt. It took me about a week to pluck up the courage to talk to someone about it, that person is so vital in my story, she told me to book a doctors appointment, and understandably I was seen within a day. I headed in for my appointment, sweaty palms with worry and a dry throat where words didn't even come out without my voice breaking, I sat down and although I was scared, I explained everything, and the doctor didn't check my lump after what I said I had discovered and noticed. I was told as there was not a female chaperon available they would not be able to assess the lump. Do you know how that made me feel? Like I was not worthy of there time. Like I shouldn't of even bothered to go! I was also told the lump would "still be a cyst and it wouldn't of changed." A word of advice, YOU KNOW YOUR BODY LIKE NO ONE ELSE so if you feel something isn't right... YOU FIGHT IT!

I left the appointment, no better of, thoughts still running through my mind and me feeling unsure about what I'd found. I went to the same person again (the friend) who said "you can't just accept that, you must go back" reluctantly after the first experience I called and requested to be seen by someone else. This time, it was a female doctor who examined me, told me it definitely did not feel like a cyst and she needed a second opinion. I cannot tell you how those minutes she left the room felt like HOURS to me, the shocked look in her face made me feel so alone. The conversation I could overhear as I walked down the corridor to do my urine sample for further testing, made me feel so cold. I didn't know what news I was about to hear and what my fate would be. I was told I needed to be booked in for an appointment at the breast clinic urgently and that my process would be fast tracked as the lump was growing rapidly and not moving. Within a week, I was at RBH having more tests, more injections, scans, more consultant meetings. I was then booked to go back to hospital AGAIN and this time, I finally had some answers after meeting my consultant.

After a painful, long, tiredness and emotional day at the hospital I was told the lump was fibroadenoma (still can't pronounce it out loud!) but has abnormalities and I would need to undergo an operation to have the lump removed and then the lump will be examined to see if there is anything further there and I will then have my final results. I was told with a lump like this one third stays the same size, one third will get smaller and one third will grow rapidly. Guess which third I fell into the category of? Rapid my lump grew to 5cm (which is HUGE) and they are certain it'll grow again before my operation date (my operation is infact tommorow, I've had this post planned to upload for the past week - but I didn't know if I wanted too - but here I am, now ready to post it.) I'm scared for the next stage of my journey, the operation, the recovery, how I'll feel, how I'll heal but that's just the next chapter.

If you'd be interested, I'll tell you the rest of my journey, I've never ever had an operation before but I need to do this to feel better and for my health. 

I can't wait to get on with my life...

I want to share this link with you from the NHS website which explains exactly how to check your breasts and what changes / differences to look out for. Please click here to read more. If you notice something, please contact your doctor immediately.

I'd love it if you'd leave me a comment on this post!

Em oxo